Looking back 2018 was a pretty great year. I had my trials and tribulations but overall it was pretty spectacular. I met the love of my life and have reconnected with old friends. I’ve learned what fuels my fire and what does not. In the grand scheme of things it was a great year; however, I lost sight of my goals in 2018. I let negative energy of others overwhelm me and I was caught in the jet wash. I slipped into old patterns of comparison and disordered eating. My mental health faltered; and subsequently my physical health then something I swore I would never let happen: my business suffered.
Rather than dwelling on shortcomings of 2018 I’m choosing to look forward. I know enough to not make the same mistakes; I’m refusing to spend anymore time pinpointing what I should have done differently. Instead I am looking to the future and focusing on the new year. New goals. New boundaries. And a newfound positivity.
I always set intentions for the new year. These intentions: words of the year, if you will, end up being my goals and ultimately what I strive toward throughout the year. This year, my intentions are:
MINIMAL. BOUNDARIES. POSITIVITY.
As 2018 comes to a close these words have been shouting at me. I see and hear them everywhere I look. It might sound strange, but that is how I choose my intentions. I don’t choose them at all. They choose me. In the late days of the year that’s coming to a close or the early days of the new year when I’m trying to unwind, recenter, and find some damn chill that’s when intentions present themselves to me.
Y’all have heard of retail therapy, yes? Well when shit gets hard I take that phrase to a whole new extreme. Before I know what the hell happened I have a brand new set of decor in my home, new samples for the studio, new props, a freshly painted wall, and where the f*ck did these 4 new throws come from?
New shit, new girl! That’s how that works, yeah?
Obviously that’s not a real thing. My goal and intention on the quest for minimalism is to get to the root of my need to purchase when shit hits the fan. I am on the search for a new counselor. I am working on taking a step back before I start adding shit I don’t need to my cart. At the beginning of 2018 I deleted all my CC info from websites that I frequently purchase from, I locked all my CCs in the safe, and I started paying my studio CC bill every Monday. These steps have been beneficial and I hope to continue this journey this year.
My next step in minimizing is digital:
Wow. That is a hard hitting word isn’t it?
a line that marks the limits of an area; a dividing line.
I used to have remarkable boundaries and I was excellent at respecting them. I’m not sure what happened in 2018 but the boundaries and my respect of them went to hell in a handbasket. I’m not going to go into what my boundaries are in this post; all you need to know is that in 2019 boundaries will be redefined and they will be respected. In order to help me accomplish this I have deleted social media, messenger apps, email, and studio management from my phone. I have designated times in my calendar to check these throughout the day. I’ve been practicing this for several weeks and I’m getting better at it!
Compulsively checking those apps was the most noticeable boundary issue. Once I realized what I was doing I took a hard look at the rest of my values and boundaries I had set and I’ll be damned if I hadn’t just thrown it all out the window. Y’all. I have a damn document written and I completely ignored it!
I deleted those apps and whaddya know my moral shot through the roof. I wasn’t constantly tuned into my email which frankly only pissed me off. I wasn’t constantly seeing and becoming irritated by ignorant swine posting about topics they didn’t take time to fully research and understand.
I listened to a podcast about self limiting beliefs and started “dinging” myself whenever one crept into my mind. And if you think that you’re immune to my dinging, think again. If you’re going to start getting down on yourself around me, I’m going to ding those doubts right out of you. And I expect you to do the same for me!
The world is full of negativity. The first step to making it a better place for ourselves and to raise the next generation is to STOP WITH THE NEGATIVITY AND THE SELF DOUBT.
Take a look around; what is your world telling you? I encourage you to take a step back and evaluate with these final hours of 2018. What are your intentions for the coming year. The past is past; you’ve learnt from it. Now take what you’ve learned and drive full force into the new year.